Good Morning Mommy

Emma goes to daycare five days a week full time. Mostly because the daycare we love won't do part time, partially because it's really good for her development to be around those kids and partially because sometimes I have trouble taking care of myself much less her. Oh I'm much better than I was I've grown leaps and bounds. Progress is being mad with this huge mess of my brain chemistry and emotional issues. So yay me! I should be proud.

Most of the time I just try my best to be a wife, a mother and a good person. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. Like when I lose my sh*t over something stupid but hey it happens to everyone.

Usually our mornings go like this I wake up annoyed and tired at 5am because Carey's various alarms are going off but he isn't moving. So I kick him or elbow him in the back to make him get his arse up and turn the freaking noise makers off. After all I'm a rational woman, well sometimes, and it's rational to want the skull splitting noise off. Then he comes back to bed. Yes the man lays back down and relies on the fact that he hit snooze so he could nap some more instead of getting up. Which I get I completely do as I am a fellow lazy person. We're lazy together. However, it also means I have to wake myself up and him up at the same time. Not as easy feat.

Then once he's up and I'm up I make sure that Emma's up. I stumble into her room and shake her telling her it's time to get up. Sometimes I get the most adorable rumpled smile accompanied by a sleepy 'good morning mommy'. Other times I get whiny I'm a pain in the arse 3 year old not wanting to get up. Then there was the one morning where Emma insisted that it wasn't time to get up because the moon was still up. Carey tried all her could to explain to her that the sun was about to come up and they had to get dressed. I stepped in and explained yes the moon is still up but it's getting ready to sleep and the sun is waking up. So get your little bum up. That was a memorable morning.

Then it's shuffle together clothes, struggle and try not to lose my patience because she's 3, she's a girl and wants everything done in an exact order. Not my order but her order but hey she's cute so it's okay right? Right? Then it's drop daddy off at the carpool and Emma off at daycare and mommy back at home until it's time for physical therapy or various doctors appointments.

Now the routine has changed for who knows how long. Carey's work has moved from downtown to the old naval base in Algiers so no more carpool. There's supposed to be a carpool going there soon but of course the military has messed it all up. So for the meanwhile Carey is getting a ride with a friend who comes and picks him up from the house. So this morning I had the glorious moment is being able to wake up around 7:45am, stretch all my little muscles and then shuffle in to wake up Emma. Who wanted to know where daddy was and kept asking even when I told her daddy was at work. She's a daddy's girl if you didn't know.

But I got to spend the morning with my baby girl. We ate breakfast and she watched a little Toot and Puddle while I got together everything I would need for my aquatic physical therapy. We got out of the house a little before 9am and into daycare around 9:10am. Dropped her off right as they were having juice and graham crackers, gave her a kiss and was off to my 9:30am physical therapy appointment. It was..normal and wonderful. I felt like a real mom, which I don't feel like a lot because there's a lot Carey helps with. I have insecurities as a mom and constantly feel like I'm failing. Which everyone probably does I just have a few more issues medical and otherwise added in which make it difficult to play with Emma. Fibromyalgia and the constant pain, Orthostatic Hypotension and nearly passing out and whacked out hormones from surgery and birth control switches. So to feel normal? To be acting like a real mom should? It was amazing.